Sunday, April 29, 2007

Devastation and Reform

Out of all the bands that I enjoy, I think that Relient K presents the most outstanding lyrics. They have done this for years and in my opinion their Mmhmm record is the most lyrically amazing album out there (Casting Crowns' Lifesong is a close second). Relient K recently released their latest album 5 Score and Seven Years Ago and this song is from that album. The band notes that restoration can be a difficult part of life but, if we allow Him, God can bless us even through devastation. We are not reformed to a life immediately hole, or complete (and I don't think that is God's promise), but from the shell of who we once were we can start anew through Christ.

Devastation And Reform

Fear can drive stick
And it's taking me down this road
A road down which I swore I'd never go
And here I sit
Thinking of God knows what
Afraid to admit I might self-destruct

So lock the windows
And bolt the door
Cuz I've got enough problems
Without creating more

I feel like I was born
To devastation and reform
Destroying everything I loved
And the worst part is
I pull my heart out, reconstruct
And in the end it's nothing but
The shell of what I had when I first started

Usually I'll cause my own first hit
It seems to me to be slightly masochistic
But there'd be no story
Without all this dissension
So I inflict the conflict
With the utmost of contemption

So lock the windows
And bolt the door
Cuz I've got enough problems

Without creating more

I feel like I was born
To devastation and reform
Destroying everything I loved
And the worst part is
I pull my heart out, reconstruct
And in the end it's nothing but
The shell of what I had when I first started

Thank you God
For giving me the insight
So I might make
These wrongs right
If and when
There ever is a next time
Cuz failure is a blessing in disguise

Pull my heart out, reconstruct
And in the end it's nothing but
The shell of what I had when I first started
The shell of what I had when I first started

I feel like I was born
To devastation and reform
Destroying everything I loved
And the worst part is
I pull my heart out, reconstruct
And in the end it's nothing but
The shell of what I had when I first started

Friday, April 27, 2007

FCA

I had the privilege of sharing some of what God has been teaching me these last several months of life at a Fellowship of Christian Athletes meeting on March 28, 2007. I had meant to post this back then, but haven't gotten to it until now. I will do better at staying on top of things. Anyway, I have entered bellow, my notes for that evening. I thought I would share them. I hope they are meaningful to you.

Donald Miller tells a story:

He was speaking at a college to a group of students. No Christians in the room.

A girl raises her hand and says “Don you have presented a wonderful talk, but you mentioned only briefly looking into Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam, and landing on Christianity. I’m troubled to see how you made an objective search before landing on Christianity.”

He found this to be a very good question and confesses that yes, it wasn’t a very objective search. But, he notes, “I think you are coming to the table with a pre-supposition, and that pre-supposition is that Christianity is a religious or philosophical system. But it isn’t. It has been called one, it has been treated like one, but essentially I am not a Christian because I cognitively subscribe to certain ideas, I am a Christian because I know a Deity, a being, this is a relational system. I am a Christian because I have a relationship with Jesus and through Jesus a relationship with God.”

He goes on to say that essentially the question sounds like this. “Don, you are in love with your wife and yet you do not go on sleeping with hundreds of other women to find a greater love.” Do you see the difference, love in a relational sense, is exclusive.

I want you to consider two things. Why are you a Christian and how does this define you? & What does it mean to be a Christian athlete on this campus?

How can we affect the lives of our friends and teammates who are here? How do we show them, not a religion or system of beliefs, but what a relationship with Jesus is like?

These are some of the things that I have been learning. I realized I related to God as a product. I took a system of beliefs and treated it like a recipe check-list. I prayed today - check. I read the Bible today - check. I went to church this week - check.

I had the world around me telling me that I was incomplete and all I needed was belief in God and that would complete me. If I followed the system of beliefs, the recipe, then the product would be a personal relationship with God. This “personal relationship” is more of a genii in a bottle kind of thing. I can pray and God will answer and I’ll be rich and happy and completely fulfilled. Right?

But I wasn’t complete. I would pray the prayer I was supposed to pray and "bad things" still happened. God, the product, was not holding up to the guarantee on the box. Well maybe I read the recipe wrong. Maybe I should pray more, read more of the Bible, go to church more often, sing in the choir. But no, these things aren’t the answer.

You see God is not a product. The problem with God, the product, is this. I was presented with the fact that I am incomplete and I needed to be filled, so I adopt this system of beliefs that is supposed to complete me. Then I realize that not only has this not completed me, but I am also now aware that I wasn’t even complete in the first place, so things are even worse of then when I started.

How many of you have heard this? There is a hole in your life, a sense of incompleteness. And lets say this is a round hole and you have tried to fill it with the square peg of rock and roll or whatever and your job hasn’t filled this whole, athletics maybe hasn’t. But Jesus happens to be a round peg, who knew, and if you put Jesus in this hole he is the only one that can fit and you will be made complete.

Ever heard anything like that? . . . It’s a lie. How many of you are complete. This is not a biblical thought and yet it is presented to us all the time and it results in us seeing God as a product.

But what if, rather than a system of beliefs, we instead replace this with a relationship? We replace God, the product, with God, the Father.

You see, this is all though scripture. The gospels are not a 3 step sermon to salvation, but the story of Jesus’ life and his relationship with his Father. In this we see how to be in a relationship with Jesus and in turn with God. How does a relationship differ than a system of beliefs? There will be similar actions, but the purpose behind these actions will be different.

I will pray to God, but not because I am checking off my list or rubbing the magic lamp to get a wish, but instead because this is how I can communicate with God. I will read the Bible not in search of a magic formula that will then allow me to have all I have ever wanted but because in the writings of the Bible I can learn about who God is and who Jesus is. I can see what it means to love and to give to the poor and care for the widowed and live a life that is Christ-like, because just like a son loves his father and wants to grow up to be like his earthly dad, so do I, as a Christian want to know about Jesus and God, the father, and grow to be more like them.

See how it is changing? There is a shift from have to, to want to. This makes prayer and bible study so much more real in my life.

Then there is church. Living a life in community. While God is fathering me as an individual, he is also relating me, to us, as the body of Christ, the church, in a relational sense more so described as that of a bride and bridegroom. There is benefit to being involved in life communally. It gives us person to person relationships and this interaction teaches us so much about life and God and strengthens our relationships with God.

This is what God has been showing me. He very clearly allowed me to see how I related to him as a product. A way to fulfill my desires, to fill the round hole in my life. And he showed me that this is what he wanted instead. He wanted me to relate to him. To see that scripture is not a collection of stories that are formulas for personal growth rather they are stories to help me understand His character and nature and how to interact with him. He wanted me to see that prayer is not my chance to complain or beg or find wish fulfillment, but a time to be honest, to relate to God. To sometimes go to God in awe of who he is and other times talk to him like I would my dad. With this, the idea of praying continually makes so much more sense. To constantly be walking through the day communicating with God, much like you would a friend. This is God’s desire. When God is a product we are seeing things this way: “How can God help me get what I want?” When God is Father we ask, “Who is God, and how can I know him”.

Miller tells a story in his book Blue Like Jazz. I don't have it in front of me so I will probably butcher it, but it goes something like this.

Don was being interviewed on a radio station and the host asked him to defend Christianity. Miller responded by saying, no, I won't do that. He went on to explain to the radio host that Christianity has become a term that means so many different things to so many people and he didn't want to add to the ideas out there of what Christianity was. If he defended Christianity to someone who was abused in a church it's like he saying that was right and it wasn't. Miller said what he would do is talk about Jesus and what a relationship with him matters.

The radio announcer was speechless and after the interview they went out to eat together and he said he always wanted to believe in God, but just couldn't because of all the things that Christians do. They talked and Don showed a Father, not a product.

Friday, March 2, 2007

Hide

Without a doubt, my favorite new band of 2006 is a band named Red. In fact, they are probably my favorite band all in all right now. In their debut album, End of Silence, they wrote this song, Hide. It speaks of trying to out run the painful memories of our past, trying to out run God, but in the process we run from the only thing that can really heal us, the love of God.

Hide

Waste away
I'm crawling blind
Hollowed by what I left inside
For you, just you
I'm caught in place
But I ignore what I can't erase

I will run and hide till memories fade away
And I will leave behind a love so strong

Close my eyes
theses voices say
Haunting me, I can't escape
For you, just you
Time will always wait
While I throw away what I can't replace

I will run and hide till memories fade away
And I will leave behind a love so strong

I will run and hide!
And I will leave behind!

I will run and hide till memories fade away
And I will leave behind a love so strong!

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Blessings

So far my posts have focused on my reflections on different readings. Well, I'm kind of all read out right now. This has been good because it has given me a chance to not just take things that I agree with from other people (via these readings), but just talking through real life with other people and look at what it means to put thoughts and beliefs into practice.
In looking at real life I have been blown away by the blessings that surround me. Very specifically I had a chance to enjoy an amazing concert put on by Pillar and I enjoyed that with 2 friends that have just been irreplaceable in my life, especially as of late. I had an absolute blast and I love you guys. Thank you for loving me even when it looks like everything is falling apart.
I have also been working a ton lately with no break in sight until the end of May or so. But it hasn't been as stressful as I would imagine it to be. I have been establishing solid relationships with my athletes and coaches and am really having this sense of belonging that I wasn't as aware of during the fall semester. It is truly a blessing.
I have a friend who is just blown away by his relationship with his girlfriend right now. I hear him talk about her and it is amazing to see how God loves the two of them and has brought them together. It touches me to see God be a part of a relationship the way He is with these two. I know if this aspect remains they will reap the benefits of His hand and will live an amazing life together. I don't mean to be playing wedding bells for them or anything, it is just cool to see what two Godly people in a dating relationship can look like. I'm blessed to see it in you guys and I'm praying for both of you.
I got a phone call from a friend tonight. He moved to the Dallas area last summer. He knew there was something about the move that God had orchestrated, but it would be an understatement to say that these last several months have been very difficult for him. But I get this phone call tonight and you can just hear the joy in his voice. He is beginning to see and experience some of what he know God has had in store for him all along and it's transforming his life. I could hear it through the phone like I could feel it. It's just so cool.
When I take an honest look at it, the blessing are endless. My family is amazing, my friends could not be more solid or more of an encouragement, and despite the dark corners of my life I can see God's hand working through it all. I'm not trying to say "follow God and everything will be o.k. and you will be blessed and happy and rich". I think maybe your idea of what it means to be blessed and happy may change some, I know mine has. I do know that tonight was one of those times that I could see clearly that I have been blessed and God is taking care of me. My prayer is that my life will be a reflection of the love God has shown me so that those around me know that He loves them as well.
I love you guys. May the God of heaven be praised tonight and always.

AO

Sunday, February 11, 2007

Chosen to be like Him

My most recent readings have taken me through Rob Bell's book Velvet Elvis. This is another spectacular book in a long line of amazing books that I have had the privilege to read over the past year or so now.
There were a few concepts that Bell pointed out that I just loved. First, he always referred to our lives and the goings on as our story. I don't know why, but this resonated with me. This idea that the things that go on in your life become part of you, who you are. The people in your life impact your story and you impact theirs. I know this is kind of a "well duh" thing, but it made me look at how I might affect the stories around me and it made me really embrace my story. When you think about how your actions now may affect you and those around you, maybe even 30 years down the road, it just makes you think.
I thought there were some great insights into Jewish life and specifically what this meant for Jesus and the disciples.
Bell outlines what it would have been like growing up as a Jewish boy in those days. What Jesus would have learned at what ages and how this impacted him. It's really interesting. One thing he mentions is when a rabbi was teaching and asking questions he would seldom give answers. "Have you noticed how Jesus rarely answers a question, but always responds with another question? This is a way of showing a deeper understanding, that a student not only understands the information, but can take it a step further. "
Those students who excel would become disciples. This isn't just further learning. "The goal of the disciple wasn't simply to know what the rabbi knew, but to be just like the rabbi."
So the question for the rabbi is, can this kid cut it as my disciple. Can he be like me, know the things I know, live how I live, take on my life and live it even after I am gone. The kid would leave everything behind to study as a disciple at the feet of his rabbi. What an honor to be a disciple.
"So at the age of 30, when a rabbi generally began his public teaching and training of disciples, we find Jesus walking along the Sea of Galilee". He first calls Simon Peter and Andrew, who were fishermen. This shows that as younger kids they weren't good enough to "cut it" and went off to learn the family trade. Jesus says "Come follow me" and they drop everything. He is telling them "You can be like me". Of course they drop their nets, they are being told a rabbi thinks they can do what he does. He thinks they can be like him.
James and John were fishing with their father. With their father, how old were they then, 14, 15, maybe 20. They are just kids. "Jesus took some boys who didn't make the cut and changed the course of history."
Take Jesus walking on water. I always thought this was a weird story. Was this just some example of Jesus showing that he is God and can do whatever he wants? Maybe, but think about Peter. As a disciple he has been told that he can be like his rabbi and that is the point of it all. So he sees Jesus walking on water and of course he wants to do it. When he begins to sink he cries out to Jesus. Jesus says, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?" "Who does Peter loose faith in? Not Jesus; Jesus is doing fine. Peter loses faith in Himself. Peter loses faith that he can do what his rabbi is doing."
Remember, a rabbi calls disciples because he has faith in them. He believes they can be like him. Note that Jesus gets frustrated with his disciples, but also note why. It isn't because they are incapable, but because they are so capable. It isn't their failures, but because he sees their greatness and they don't.
"God has an incredibly high view of people. God believes that people are capable of amazing things. i have been told that i need to believe in Jesus. Which is a good thing. but what I am learning is that Jesus believes in me. I have been told that I need to have faith in God. Which is a good thing.l But what I am learning is that God has faith in me. The rabbi thinks we can be like him."

Thursday, February 1, 2007

Would Jesus be a Christian?

I recently (yesterday) finished a book that I had requested for Christmas. It is titled A Generous Orthodoxy by Brian D McLaren. The general (very general) premise of the book is to discus various beliefs that we have as Christians, where those beliefs came from, some of the good and bad of those beliefs and what this means for us in the world that we live in today. It is so much more than that when you get into it, but that is an o.k. summary.
The twist is that McLaren isn't sitting there pointing to the Christian community out there rather talking about his personal experiences as an unfinished, growing, ever changing believer in God. I have half joked a couple of times with Hayne that we should write a book about all the things God has been teaching us over the last year or so. I don't feel that need to write as much now because of this book. With a few exceptions I think it is amazing. At this point I'd say you could read any (all) of Donald Miller's book and this one and have the beginnings of some sort of understanding of what God has been showing me and doing in my life.
Let me give you some little bits form the book. Chapter 3: Would Jesus be a Christian?
"The more I study the Bible and reflect on the life and teachings of Jesus, the more I think most of Christianity as practiced today has very little to do with the real Jesus found there. Often I don't think Jesus would be caught dead as a Christian, were he physically here today. Generally, I don't think Christians would like Jesus if he showed up today as he did 2000 years ago. in fact, I think we'd call him a heretic and plot to kill him, too."
Not a bad start to a chapter right? He goes on. "Has he [Jesus] become less our Lord and more our Mascot? Lord means "master" (the very opposite of mascot)...I feel surrounded by Christians who very much like the idea of an American God and a middle-class Republican Jesus, first and foremost concerned about Our National Security and our Way of Life. "The Lord is my shepherd" becomes "the Lord is our President" elected by us for our national interest, or "the Lord is our secretary of defense", ready to sacrifice 10,000 lives of non-citizens elsewhere for the safety of U.S. citizens here."
McLaren goes on from here discussing what it was that Jesus really came to do in this world and how it applies today just as much as it did when he walked the Roman controlled streets of Jerusalem. He summarizes this chapter with this. "The result [modern Christianity] is a religion that Jesus might consider about as useful as many non-Christians consider it today, just as the Lord said they would (Mat. 5:13-16; 7:21-23).
The chapters that follow get into different aspects and branches of Christianity. Methodist, Catholic, Evangelicals and so on and so forth. It is all wonderful. I happen to enjoy his writing style as well.
In Chapter 17: Why I Am Incarnational he starts to flirt with a very daunting line. Some of his writing sounds like universalism. While he refutes this he also seems to support it. There is a lot of back and forth writing that at times almost seems to contradict itself. However, aside from these things (and really even with this), I find the book very interesting and challenging and meeting me right where I am in trying to live daily in light of Jesus and my desires to honor him.
I know this isn't the most thorough critique of this book, but it would take me forever. I do hope that this little bit that I have written makes you think and just encourages you to take this life God has given us with the seriouseness, love, devotion, humility, aggression, fear, tact, and wildness that it deserves.
Till next time.

AO

Sunday, January 21, 2007

Beauty From Pain

Thanks to Superchic(k) for supplying some insightful lyrics. This lyricist seems to have dealt with something dark in her past. Something that could easily keep her away from her relationship with God and community. What a way to react. This is from their album Beauty From Pain...another great idea to think about. Enjoy!

Stand in the Rain

She never slows down
She doesn’t know why but she knows that
When she’s all alone it feels like its all coming down

She won’t turn around
The shadows are long and she fears
If she cries that first tear, the tears will not stop raining down

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it’s all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won’t drown
And one day what’s lost can be found
You stand in the rain

She won’t make a sound
Alone in this fight with herself
And the fears whispering if she stands she’ll fall down

She wants to be found
The only way out is through everything
She’s running from, wants to give up and lie down

So stand in the rain
Stand your ground
Stand up when it’s all crashing down
You stand through the pain
You won’t drown
And one day what’s lost can be found
You stand in the rain

Superchic(k)